Thoughts

So it is nearly the end of a year. I won't be so poetic today. Just some thoughts letting flow. I passed a lot of years, and this will be one more. Honestly, I don't take any resolutions so this time too the streak continues. I don't have any regrets. It's always better to learn from the mistakes. We are humans, I am a human so mistakes are obvious. So thank you so much to this year for all it gave. I had all, happiness, sadness, pride; it brought a lot of changes to me and to my life, a lot turning points, and everything worth it, So no regrets, I smile every single memories I had with everyone, I will treasure everything. And now I am ready to welcome a year for a lot more memories... I will have my ways ... Hope it is worth to choose those I welcome you 2018..... And a warm goodbye to 2017.....

White dress, Red lips, Rosy cheeks Dressed in front of the mirror Just swirling into the fantasies Of those beautiful days That are welcoming them forth A sudden ring just untangled her From her fantasies "I am so sorry, but You are not the one for me I can't marry you" That's all the call said She was standing Under the chandelier all numb All the pieces of glass on it reflected her Deep down seems like those Are the pie ces she is brok en into Her heart couldn't take it And she gave up After a long In the same way there she was Tangled in her fantasies And a ring "Sweetheart, I love you so much" And the chandelier still hanging there But t hose glasses on the chandelier No more reflected her .......

I am never so into someone , I never was drown into someone's thought , I was never so lost . I was going through my diary where I wrote about those first butterflies I got when I used to have your thoughts . I love you so much. I remembered my friends teasing me with your name. In those rendezvous why you be the only topic for my friends. Was I so much into you . And finally you happened to me. I remembered you telling me that you love me and I was asking you again and again if you are really saying that you love me. Things were great . I started feeling that : Yes, u are the one. You are the guy maybe I dreamt whom I met in a mysterious way. I loved you with whatever I had. And you told me too that you love me. But why now all those seems fake to me.... Once I used to think that I really made you fall for me. But I was just a mirror to you at whom you were trying to find someone else. You always tried to find her reflection in that mirror which was unfortunately me....

Here, I was awake ..... Trying so hard to sleep Then, I looked through the playlist and I played songs and with every song I went back to past when you were there for just me. And then I stopped the music because I was again drowning in your thoughts. And then I fallen asleep after a long time. But it was again you in there. I dreamt the way u hold my hands like I am a baby... But it was so amazing .... That touch.... The way u were smiling at me.... And I became shy.... And your forehead kiss.... It ached so much inside... That when I woke up I found myself crying I know I will never be the one with whom u find comfort I know I will never be the one whom u can love But still my heart just can't believe that even if I loved u so much .... U didn't love me a lil bit... How ? How my love never reached you.... How? Whi ch is worst? That you are in my dreams or that you are not with me in reali ty ......

Oops! I fell somewhere. Ouch! What is this? I am so use to this place. Wait, it's the place known as reality. Then where was I till now, somewhere which is not real........ Umm...... Illusion? Is it so? Oh wait! I can see something there on the floor. LOL, those are my heart pieces. It looks weird..... It got a lot of scars, a lot brutal, some scratches. Something clotting inside there..... Eww.... It's dirty secrets. Wait... What is this beautiful thing inside it? Oh, it is known as trust, love ... Oh god it's fading... Fading... And gone.... Fuck!!! Where it's gone? No wait ... It's breaking into more small er pieces ... The HEART.. And done!!!! Per fect!!!! Cong ratulations! It 's tot ally brok en..... And now you can't put those pieces back anymore. See, now you don't have to work anymore coz whatever you will do ..... It won't be broken anymore from now on. Keep up the work....

For some you are just one of those black clouds even though they were your rainbow . . . . . . P.s. I think u came in my life just to make me understand that....... Thanks for making me your one of the black clouds like everyone else did